Dad

This past Thursday, July 11, 2024, my dad would have turned 75. On that occasion, his beloved wife and the majority of his posterity were able to gather at the home on Eastmoor Drive where we grew up, enjoy some pizza, cake, and ice cream, and reminisce about my dad.

My mom, Jeanell, and sisters- and brother-in-law recalled their first meetings with him and first impressions. About how he could sometimes be intimidating, but that the intimidation was balanced by his goofy sense of humor. My mom talked about meeting him at BYU when she attended a Sunday School class he was teaching and being impressed with his knowledge of the gospel. Jeanell recalled how he would bang on the wall if he had gone to bed and we were being too loud in the family room on the other side of that wall. Jeanell also remembered coming to our house after my youngest sister McKell was born and how my dad was so tender and protective of his long-awaited baby girl.

We talked about his numerous sayings: "Nice to see me," "Pardon the growth," "Drive safely, the life you save may vote Republican in [whatever the next election year was],"Patience is a virtue, possessed by few, especially when it comes to you," and "I've told you a million times not to exaggerate!"

We talked about his relentless optimism and enthusiasm. How he always was convinced that he lived in the best ward in the best stake in the best community and that his kids attended the best high school. He also believed that he worked at the best temple (the Salt Lake Temple) and we wondered if he ever would have been able to realign his loyalties to the Deseret Peak Temple. (My mom related how my dad had asked President Hales years ago if there would ever be a temple in the Tooele Valley, to which President Hales had responded, "Not in your lifetime." When a temple was announced for the Tooele Valley, my dad, who was still alive at the time, went back to President Hales and asked if he knew something my dad did not. Apparently he did).

Alan reflected on how my dad was very introspective and always seeking to improve himself. Alan's example was that he had seen my dad get physical with me (which I do not recall), and then felt bad about it and decided that would not be him and improved. I remember as a young child, one of my dad's expressions was "Good Godfrey!" until I pointed out that you couldn't say "Godfrey" without saying "God," at which point I never heard him use that expression again. My dad was one to make schedules and lists of goals or tasks he wished to accomplish. Right up until his death, he went to the gym five days a week.

(I don't ever remember my dad getting physical with me. The one related memory I do recall is when Scott and I were very young, before we even moved to Grantsville. We had been misbehaving to the point that we were both to receive "bare-bottomed" spankings. I remember sitting and awaiting our punishment, but when the time came, he just lightly tapped us both on the butt and that was the end of it).

My dad preferred teaching and quoting scripture to anger and yelling when correcting his kids. (There were exceptions. We all remember an occasion when he had asked us to mow the lawn before he left to work and when he returned to find the lawn still un-mowed, said in a very stern voice, "I am mad. I am damn mad." Since my dad rarely used the d-word (at least at that point of his life), that was enough that Scott had the lawnmower started and moving across the lawn within two minutes). Alan told a story at my dad's funeral of a time when a few of my brothers (certainly not me) had watched a movie my dad felt was inappropriate, but that rather than chewing them out, he turned to the scriptures, and the story of Joseph who was sold into Egypt and avoiding temptation.

We talked about some of our favorite memories. I remembered how as a young teenager, in a late night conversation with my dad about feeling frustrated that my basketball skills were not improving, he asked if I wanted to go shoot baskets right then, which we did, with him rebounding for me until well after 10 PM. My dad was also supportive of our own efforts at self-improvement and I remember many early mornings when he would take me to a church gym to shoot and work on my skills.

Brent recalled his favorite memory of my dad catching Brent and Kevin mooning each other, but was unable to contain his laughter, to the point that he had to go and get my mom to reprimand them.

My dad could begin laughing uncontrollably, sometimes at the most inopportune times. When my Uncle John blessed his youngest daughter Emma, he asked my dad to give a blessing on the food at the gathering afterward. But something struck my dad as funny and try as he might, he was unable to compose himself. My mom had to intercede and finish the prayer.

My dad could be tender-hearted and at different times was fairly easily moved to tears, but invariably, a few seconds after he would begin to cry, he would burst into laughter.

My dad had his flaws, but I do believe he was a force for good in this world. I believe he had a positive influence on many, many people and that his impact and legacy continue on.

I love you, Dad. Happy Birthday!